So this morning while on my paper route, this kid, maybe a young teenager, asked me to borrow my phone outside a gas station. I told him sure, make it quick, Im working.
As soon as I hand him my Iphone, my mind starts racing. Where’s his phone, everyone has a phone these days, my nine year old has had a phone for years! This is a decent side of town, why doesnt he have a phone of his own, I ask myself. Then the addict mind starts waking, he’s gonna run, he’s gonna take off and run with my Iphone! So I brace myself, I get ready for a chase and I imagine myself tackling this youngster and taking him out on the oily gas station floor. Then I hear, “Mama, can I go home, mama, Im sorry, I just wanna go home.” (Tear-drop, sniffle, tear-drop, sniffle some more)
Aaaaaand..here comes the guilt patrol! Im such a jerk, judging this kid and sizing him up because he’s young and dosent wear the clothes that I do. BUT, wait for it, the second I dont judge, my Iphone is off and running! OR, maybe Im just worried about the wrong thing, and I need to take a look at myself, instead of looking and pointing at other people.
Grrrrrrrrr…! Sometimes I hate SOBRIETY!, every little event today in life is always some dam lesson!!!
Its whatever it takes to stay I guess!
(1 year and 22 days sober after 23 years of using and drinking!)
Sometimes it really gets to me too. Hey, congrats on the year mark and wish you all the best 🙂
Thank ya sir, i can see some many things that I couldnt when I was using and drinking, my mind is so awake now! Thanks for taking the time to read and comment!!!!!